But the Bible says that God provided mankind with a magic potion to perform *involuntary* abortions. Numbers 5:11-31. So he doesn't come across as particularly anti-abortion.

And think of all the pregnant women he drowned in the Great Flood. And all the miscarriages he causes.

'A murderer and a rapist walk into a bar...'

Here is OJ Simpson with Donald Trump and a pre-plastic surgery Ivanka.

Now that OJ Simpson has been dispatched to Hell to search for the real killers, I eagerly await an even more iconic Bronco chase.

These willfully stupid people acting like the worst thing OJ Simpson ever did was get vaccinated.

Donald Trump on Abortion:

11:57 AM 'I support a federal ban on abortion.'

11:58 AM 'I don't support a federal ban on abortion.'

12:00 PM 'It should be left to the states.'

12:01 PM 'Arizona went too far.'

12:15 PM 'For the love of God, just tell me what you want me to say!'

Beyond time to block him.

NARRATOR: 'Donald Trump would 100%, absolutely, no question about it, sign a federal abortion ban if it showed up on his Oval Office desk in 2025. He lied about this because he saw how unpopular that was before the election. But if he is reelected he won't care what voters want.'

Moments ago, former Speaker Nancy Pelosi on current Speaker Mike Johnson's being scared to do the right thing because the Freedom Caucus threatens to vacate the chair:

'Why are we there? We're there to *do* a job, not *keep* a job.'

Welcome to our world, Jeff…

Trump's Nuanced Abortion Position

MON: 'Without me, SCOTUS could never have overturned abortion rights.'

TUES: 'I'm not in favor of overturning abortion rights.'

WED: 'Without me, Roe v. Wade would never have been overturned.'

THURS: 'I'm not for overturning abortion rights.'

Donald is promoting 'States' Rights.'

Who else does that?

Oh, I know!

People making excuses for slavery and lying about the Civil War.

What is funny about this is that wasn't the joke. Twitter is genuinely censoring my account.

But it works as a different joke.

No, Donald—it’s about women’s rights.

Kari Lake came up with a clever way to make Donald Trump think DJT stock is doing great:

Trump is publicly saying he won’t support a national abortion ban so as not to motivate Democrats and women before the election.

But I’m 100% certain he is privately assuring evangelicals that he will support one *after* the election so as to motivate them.

Girls! Girls! You’re *both* awful.