raising my BAC past the legal limit singularly by watching i think you should leave

Please don’t advertise anything to me with an inseam longer that 6 inches you fucking Neanderthals

i just discovered i can crop my shirts. holy shit. no more tucking in. short men never needed to live in fear because we have scissors

being a strava user (derogatory) is the craziest shit. i’ll go up to you with a straight face and ask your resting heart rate

filipino excellence

is the word ' Poop' a slur? The ansuwer, is looking more and more like Yes

oppenheimer on LinkedIn

zoom cameo’d in this one, bringing me back to the first time dave asked me to help with a tiktok in 2021 when i lived in [checks notes] goodyear, arizona

In today’s second The Washington Post TikTok, I explained upcoming 2023 summer movies to some coworkers.

Featuring Craig Timberg, Sean Carter, angel, Jesús Rodríguez, Sarah Parnass, Amy Nakamura, and Dan Steinberg
tiktok.com/t/ZTRoAd8q1/

kendall roy almost killed jeremy strong

me with whole milk

just made ppl do breakout rooms in zoom for the first time and my knees started hurting

answered an email

This is what you get without an HOA. We have one place in our neighborhood that isn’t governed by the HOA and this is what we get as a neighbor.

HELP