You mfs beefing with BABIES omg who cares!!!

Hate it when those huge bags of little brown cookies have the words "pet food only" on them that sounds like quitter talk.

ALL twitter artists deserve to burn in the deepest pit of hell for eternity

When the traveller doesn't comprehend what he asks of you and you gotta hit em with the potion seller stare

They're like my 3 progressively more evil weed smoking girlfriends.

what a week huh, pass the yaoi

Why must beekeepers fight? :(

interview with the vampire but the interviewer is philomena cunk

Just arrived at dashcon... wait why is there a ballpit where are all the sidescrolling music platfomers? :(

I'm on the beach that makes you old having the sex that makes you gay

She fight on my foo till im everlong

Did anyone else have a random politician they loved as a little kid? When I was 4 years old I was weirdly obsessed with Kevin Rudd. I thought he was so cool.

Swarm of bees has moved in to my kitchen... literally what am I supposed to do about this there's just like 50 bees buzzing around in there

2 big badass fish making out & they're both boys call that bara-cuda send tweet.

Yesterday when I got back from my lunch break there were little grains of smn all over my desk, as I was trying to figure it out I see my boss pull out a gun that shoots little pellets of salt at high velocity which she had been using to execute flies at point blank range.

What if instead of being called freaky friday it was called 𝓾𝓱𝓶𝓶, 𝓾𝓱....