36 MPs have quit or been suspended since the last election. Of those cases:

- Nine involved allegations of sexual misconduct
- Three involved criminal convictions
- One involved I’m a Celebrity
- And one involved a prime minister misleading Parliament

Hahahahaha

I see the pissed chimpanzee headline generator factory has been in overdrive again.

It never ends. Is there someone in Tory central office who makes these and has to publish one every hour or something it’s really weird when you’re meant to be in charge of like an entire country.

She’s such a mess.

Maybe they should give up their Netflix accounts etc.

Quite the take off. 🇸🇬

😂

Please keep sharing! 🩷 #EnhertuEmergency

No one who knows anything about cloud seeding, about the UAE, or about climate science thinks the Dubai weather catastrophe was caused by cloud seeding. The people who do the cloud seeding have literally explained why it wouldn’t lead to that.

If you believe it, you’re a moron.

I get the strong impression that increasing our purchases from Colombia has been about the only significant trade deal Tories have managed to pull off.

Liz Truss as PM was also a case of a Tory MP being locked in a flat by some very bad people, mainly the European Research Group, and it also cost a lot of money, like our entire economy, to get her out.

Menzies just following his ex leader.

I actually have no words…..

‘Refused entry’, promote the subeditor immediately.

In tomorrow’s news, we uncover the tale of a Tory MP caught trying to squash baby otters into a microwave whilst ordering his mistress to film him doing it, after which he caked her in marmite and tried to persuade her parents to smuggle her out of the country in a lead coffin.

Maybe Menzies is simply auditioning to be a Reform UK candidate?