like to believe this is what the guy who stole my 2017 kia soul is doing rn

the barnes and Noble cafe employees freak the fuck out if you call them a Starbucks. oh sorry guys i forgot. u are clearly a beautiful greek restaurant

FUCK every pic of me eating looks like If You Give A Mouse a Cookie

that immersive van gogh sunflower exhibit was an all-time grift. they had u guys paying to stand on a powerpoint

covid19

guy whose favorite thing is saying “man, this is what it’s all about..” but his life kinda sucks so he says that shit at game night or something and everyone is like “I guess”

Jon Favreau understood the assignment 👏

i use toilet paper the long way like im shining a bowling ball

“the best things in life are free” wrong. dumbass. the best things in life cost a quarter. Pinball. gumball. wish from fountain. song from nephew

pj carter hambley This is the new Carter Hambley

im setting myself apart from the pack (telling every girl at the bar i “just moved here from the jungle”)

no. he is having baby ❤️