Can we stop selling ratan peacock chair PLANT STANDS, I keep thinking I'm about to score a human sized peacock chair for $25.

Right

Please stop trying to have a conversation with me if you are wearing sunglasses and I am not.

Sometimes I get upset with myself for not thawing meat for a meal and then remember that there are vegan's who live just fine with their meals.

I also remember I grew up poor and sometimes my meals were those dinner rolls with pasta sauce in the middle and I was actually happily snackin, NGL.

Cauliflower & sweet potato tacos. Take that Count Olaf.

All those years forging excuse letters from my mom to my teachers has prepared me for this day as I write My 5 year olds school absence letter. With love, always.

this is kinda a deep tweet, but something I’ve realized this year is that: it’s not about being the best or being perfect, it’s about being a CONTRIBUTOR to the world around you with what you have and who you are

Wut

"Mom, when you sing, it makes my dreams worse... Like, when I close my eyes and you sing in the car, if makes my dreams really bad."

Staring at my hummus not knowing wether I should stir it or not before the first scoop. 🧐

There's nothing an Epsom salt bath can't fix.

I honestly can't handle another death sentence 😭. Or an extended prison sentence after learning about the Central Park five. My heart is aching today.

I'm actually not okay with my son talking about the "kids in my eyeballs watching me drink my hot chocolate." Kids are creepy & I don't know how to parent 😭

"Up on the housetop reindeer fall" he's not wrong 😭🤣