THIS WAS 10 YEARS AGO OH MY GOD 😭😭😭 NO WAY

imagine being a chicken, having a chicken family, a chicken job that you go to with a little hat on, a chicken bar you go to with your friends after work to drown out your sorrows, and then dying to become this i cba 😭

i will be remembered forever if i sell low-grade copper wire 🙏🏾🙏🏾

racist ppl get mad over the funniest things like why are they suddenly pressed about visiting heritage sites 😭😭😭 bro only heritage you should worry ab is the strange ideas and beliefs you’ve inherited from reading slop on the internet 🙏🏾🙏🏾

i ate the best food in existence recently but unfortunately it was the chef’s last day, he choked on a fruit polo and died, and in his last moments, asked me not to share any details about it or where to get it from 🙏🏾😢

if some consultants who were lazy dads existed they’d be like “yeah honey i’m directly supervising the kids remotely don’t worry bro”

i think we should fine hospitals if they pay staff late/screw it up tbh :3

i might be inattentive asf and seem like i miss every single fine detail ever, but one thing i’ll say im good at is being whipped for the ppl i love and doing unhinged side quests for them 🧡🧡🧡

ain’t gonna lie with how the NHS is i think this is a horrendous idea, i’m with this as a concept but we’re one local policy/protocol away from an absolute disaster x

the hardest question to answer in this hospital is “who’s this patient under?” and it’s acc making me want to join a parisian circus but instead of doing backflips during shows, i’d do it off a cliff while spitting fire or some cartoonish type shit bc oh my GOD

when you give them the equivalent of a peanut tied to a stick with string, they can’t really do much else lol like subway, you can’t hate the sandwich you made 🫡

there’s a whole load of mfs i know that need this doing to them ngl

surgeons to anaesthetists be like “oi gas wanker, lift up the table 😡” (emoji included, somehow)

bro ppl need to stop being so SHORT on god no tables or chairs are high enough and my BACK HURTS 🗣️‼️ i’m not even that tall either please 😭 DRINK UR MILK, EAT UR VEGGIES stop drinking monster as a substitute for water, vaping instead of breathing oxygen, and not sleeping!!

“I just don't get this obsession with a medical degree in this day and age” is an incredibly wild thing to say LMAO i wonder what makes a person’s brain so deep fried ngl