If your takeaway from this is “Boeing is unsafe,” you need to accept that you’re very easily manipulated and bad at information gathering.

A cyberpunk future where you can install badly produced grey-market celebrity AI voices like Winamp skins is inevitable. You'll snag a torrent of Majel Barrett to control your lights or Samuel L. Jackson to be your alarm clock. It will seem gauche and unnecessary very quickly.

Orson Wells for Paul Masson wine is the voice that should replace Sky. "AhhhHHHHH… an isosceles triangle!"

lol Trump can’t even vote for himself this November because he was convicted of a felony

When I first moved to South Bay and saw all the stupid apartments there, one of the people showing them flat out told me they had a weekly price fixing conference call with the other management companies.

Doesn’t this look delicious and healthy? Wouldn’t you, a human, eat this if you found it in the pantry? Asking for normal and not embarrassing reasons.

Not sure folks are prepared for how much Joey is going to win by.

Got my Vision Pro playing Steam VR games through ALVR. Need to tweak the settings (stutters slightly) and find some actual controllers, but this is pretty cool.

To be fair, a Wells Fargo analyst in NYC was already having Chipotle for lunch every day, so all he did was weigh it.

It sucks we have to be like “I don’t love how the televised improv went, which makes the swimsuit competition a must-win” instead of people remembering that these two were both literally President already and they can decide how to vote based on how they did at that.

Potion seller, I am going into battle and I want your strongest potions My potions are too strong for you, traveler

Suddenly, half of the subway ads are for impenetrable B2B software. They’re all like: When Product tells HR they need a go-to-market huddle by yesterday — and there are no blockers? That’s Squindo.

Preview of the VP debate (ht/ Al Yankovic )

This type of guy is America's greatest strategic asset. They're only deployed when the stakes are highest, like covert operations or the pommel horse.

Happy to finally have a real excuse to tell people that this is the greatest moment in esports history instead of just shoehorning it into casual conversation like I normally do.

In what order should I watch the Alien movies if I haven’t seen any? Chronological or release order? Does Predator get thrown in there?

This is an absolute crime

Glad Capcom remastered one of my favorite games growing up (Marvel vs Capcom 2) but not sure it was necessary to ask me this immediately after launching it

Happy iOS 18 day! I worked on this!

Made a small correction YouGov