35 today

I’ve waited several years to say this, but

You can’t get birthday freebies from restaurants anymore without signing up for a rewards club days in advance smh we used to be a proper country

What’s wild is we are about to have a generation in the workforce that’s just as illiterate with desktops

This song feels so modern but also so autumn 1996 in suburbia. Them TikTok kids knew what they were doing putting this track with slideshows of fall foliage

Had to just bawl today man my mom’s memory is going. She could not remember that I had cancer radiation less than a year ago

Senior citizens gotta retake the driving test when they renew their drivers license

Abby did (mostly) nothing wrong

I have not put out a full length in 5 years I gotta tap back in and finish these songs

I moderate my friend’s tiktok lives, she’s in her 40’s and when it pops off it’s the most disparagingly horny oldheads from all over the world shooting Steph curry shots from the moon

I’m bout to “I’ve never seen hocus pocus before” my way into a shorty baking me an apple pie from scratch

How come the people who leave notes about parking or noise ALL got the same handwriting? All caps and certain words underlined too.

Historically, Warped Tour general admission has never cost more than a pair of vans and we’re about to see that end with another live nation cash grab

I give it until Monday before “ball up top” gets overused and repurposed by people that don’t know what it means

The correlation between personality and age when someone first got high speed internet needs to be studied

I miss when the raw and smackdown intros were just some guy yelling nonsense over metal music

Rosewood [1997]

nvm I cancelled my membership Raya lame as hell

He might have just single handedly lost the <40 white woman vote here

New TNGHT record gonna be insane