God I love older men 😍 like YESSSSS take me from behind daddy!!! 🍑✨ Tell me that I'm a good girl and that you're proud of me 🥺❤️‍🩹 Tell me that you love me and you'll protect me and that I'm safe with you!! As long as you treat me right, you can use me like a fuckdoll 🥰💚✨

For the 6 months, I feel like I've been living my life out of suitcases. Back and forth between places that aren't quite home. I hope one day dulled dust can settle on my sage suitcases, As I lay my weary head on my lover's shoulder 💚✨

Sometimes when my mental illnesses flare up, it feels like my mind is lit aflame and my head is engulfed in a blaze. Do you ever feel the same? Am I crazy?? I feel like I'm losing my grip on it all 😵‍💫🔥

You work so hard darling. You need to rest! That's right, just take it easy Let go of it all. Let your eyes close and fall asleep forever. Let the world leave you behind.

When I go, I hope I won't be alone. But who would care enough to be with me. If they cared, I wouldn't be stepping on the edge. Maybe I'll do one last stream. Leave the phone behind so nobody has to see the end. Maybe the pills will work. Maybe I should just join my friend.

The best part about not fitting in is that I'm just a temporary person. Something doesn't work? Doesn't matter. I was never gonna be kept around anyways. Just disappear. Find another "home". Love and pain is a circle. Keep kicking rocks until they turn to buckets.

I'm finally home again, back in my two bedroom apartment. I havent been back in a month, so things are pretty messy. I think I'll take some time to clean and make this room livable Back to square one, but at least I have hope for the future! I'll find a new adventuring party! 🥰

I always knew that I could be happy. I KNEW that I could be happy!!! I KNEW life isn't just awful and pain and suffering. It just wasn't then. It wasn't a week ago. It wasn't for my whole life. But now?? Now I am happy!!! IM HAPPY I KNEW IT COULD HAPPEN IM HAPPY!!! 🥰💚✨☀️✨

The past two weeks I've been slowly building myself up again. Getting myself reintegrated with who I used to be, and who I am now. Finding new ways to make me happy and maintain that happiness. It's been hard, but seeing how much I resemble myself again has made it all worth it!!

I'm swimming again, I'm posting new sets again, I'm getting cast by companies in new videos, I'm planning for the future again, and most of all, I'm happy waking up again! When life is healthy and kind, things do get better. I just needed to find my gentle seabreeze home 🥰🌟✨

What if I got married? What if I moved across the world to New Zealand? What if I got my happy ending? Would that be okay? Is it okay if I got to smile everyday for the rest of my life? Is it okay for happiness to be this simple? Maybe it always was 🥹💚✨

It's the longest day of my life. It's the most important flight of my life. It's the start of the rest of my life. It's time to meet the love of my life. -Time Of My Life 🌊💚✨