If anyone needs me I’ll be at the Tate, drawing abstract taches on the picassos. This Morning I hope producers screw up Musicals Week for ITV Get out.

Pfpfpfpft pft. Pfffffft. Pfpfpfpfpft. Pft. Pft. Pft. 💨

Lord Bill Shakespeare said that old age is second childishness.. What then, in fresh hell, are my late 30s?! Childishness 1.5.

So.. can you say threads on here without being kicked?

Anyone else pedal backwards while you’re cruising downhill on a bike, just so if someone sees you and clocks it they’re like, ‘wait.. WHAT?’ 🤯

Holy crap in a hand basket. Guys and Dolls at Bridge Theatre is just exquisite. Ryan Pidgen Owain Arthur and Kathryn Barnes all just bloody brilliant. And COLOSSAL admiration to Callum Bell who was on for the first time as Nicely. Just Top Tier.

Just broke my pinky toe. Definitely aware this is not news worthy. But I’ve never broken a bone before. So, to me, it’s momentous.

🤓

Here we go :)