put too much salt in my omelette my day is now ruined

im trying to learn to vocally reproduce the slack notification sound as a party trick. in other unrelated news, they’re checking me into the psych ward today!!!!!

hey big idea why don’t you guys implement a voice message transcription system so that i don’t have to listen to any of those

Disable IG stories if you post too many fireworks videos

feeling gossipy today!!!! about people i’ve never met before!!!

happy birthday america nice party you’ve had your day now let’s refocus our attention on ME

in my soft girl era!!!!!!!!! eating lots and lots of ice cream

the cons of having cereal in bed is, in fact, the cereal in the bed

literally flash light on hunting for stray cheerios like a night goblin, a moisturized night goblin

no baby don’t worry threads is just a friend

damn that was QUICK

i say whoops a lot for a person who never means it

[screams in overwhelmed]

My Garfield themed Motel 6 hotel room standoff is officially a part of the viral news cycle. Thanks serena and Thrillist !

Thanks so much to serena at @thrillist for featuring the GARFIELD MOTEL 6 SAGA of my bf Joey Clift and myself! Read it here: thrillist.com/news/nation/ga…

. Jack Sweeney doesn’t think the new FAA regulations will stop him from tracking billionaires’ private jets. read why in my interview with him here thrillist.com/news/nation/ce…

fighting an inner battle (eating hot cheetos)

.serena says brat summer is done and demure fall is almost here -- here's what that means for your next trip to the airport thrillist.com/news/nation/cu…

Recently, members of Thrillist Union and The Dodo Union shared our frustrations with Vox Media as the company continues to withhold the cost-of-living salary increases and promotion considerations that hundreds of other union and non-union employees received this summer.