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Scientists have found that dogs and humans share the same DNA. This would explain why my wife's a bitch, my kids hate a bath and if I could, I would lick my own balls.

It’s weird being the same age as old people.

My missus and 3 of her pals squeezed into my car after weight watchers. I muttered “Fat Cows” The missus snapped “What was that?” I said “You Herd!” #ComedyIsMyRemedy

My wife told me that she's not shaving at the moment. She calls it "Keeping warm for winter" I call it "Using your vibrator until spring"

If you were in charge of #SweatWallet, how would you burn $SWEAT? Now you can decide 💪 I just voted on how I think $SWEAT should be burned. Have an opinion? Shape the future of @sweateconomy here ➡️ medium.com/Sweat Еconomy 💧/…

💰 1,500,000 SATS UP FOR GRABS 💰 It's Friday... BTC's been going to the moon recently... so why not? A great day for a HUGE 1,500,000 Sat giveaway. LFG!! 🗣️ Here's how to play: 1⃣ Invite your friends to Ember; they must mine at least TWICE and enter a minimum of THREE FREE

Scientists in Iran have discovered a new way to convert astrocytes into oligodendrocytes, the cells that make and repair myelin in the brain. bit.ly/3UTj9VM #MS #MultipleSclerosis #MSResearch #MSNews

"You know our annual holiday?" I said to the wife, “I got it half price today." “Wow! How did you manage that?" she asked. “You're not coming." #ComedyIsMyRemedy

The older I get the more I understand why cockerels just scream to start their day!

Picture that I took yesterday left me speechless…

Far-right Tommy Robinson supporter blames immigrants to why he cannot get a job. However turns that he was convicted for molesting a 7 year old girl. #UKriots #FarageRiots #England #Breaking #Islamaphobia

How’s life treating you?!?

The fire is magical….

Check out Kurtay Toros! #TikTok tiktok.com/@kurtdaturk?_t…

Check out Kurtay Toros's video! #TikTok vm.tiktok.com/ZGeKdv632/