Check it out! Our own Lesbian Death Bed: The Bed that Eats Pussy will be half of @tenebrouspress's SPLIT SCREAM V5 this July with the gothic western 'The Ballad of Horse Girl!' -- the other half will be @lyndseycroal's 'The Girl with Barnacles for Eyes!'

Crowley: I get laid ALL the time!
Barker: sure pal
Crowley: like, SO MANY scarlet women
Barker: right
Crowley: CHICKS DIG THE PYRAMID HAT!
Barker: sure they do
Crowley: I
Crowley: SHUT UP
Crowley: I'LL PUT YOU IN A LOCKER!

Crowley: what's wrong with my hat?!
Barker: nothing it's great, you definitely look super cool
Crowley: this nerd is TOAST!
Leah Hirsig: no babe don't do it he's not worth it
Crowley: sorry babe i gotta pound this nerd
Crowley: NOBODY MESSES WITH THE GREAT BEAST!

Maugham: yeah this magician just totally choked in the final play, couldn't even score a touch down
Crowley: hey wait a second!
Crowley: is this story making fun of me?!
Barker: oh why would anyone make fun of you, aleister?
Barker: you in your big pyramid hat

Crowley: whatever, this story sucks anyway
Crowley: it's totally just plagiarized
Crowley: totally plagiarized from
Crowley:
Crowley: something, probably
Crowley:
Crowley: i'm gonna post that call-out