wish eminem would just drop his mom's spaghetti recipe already.

my stuffed fren sebastian. is a little shy. but he wanted me to tell you. he thinks you’re doing great

Alexandria Cortez just said “They [GOP] had to amend the Constitution of the United States to make sure Roosevelt did not get re-elected,” She’s referring to the 22nd Amendment, which was passed in 1947. Roosevelt died in 1945. Not an April Fools prank, she’s just an idiot.

I will give up avocados for the rest of my life if it means kids aren’t sex trafficked anymore across the southern border

Alright Arya, now it’s time for Cersei and the creepy Greyjoy uncle to die

Upset homegirl died, sure, but even more upset that Creepy Greyjoy STILL has a head on his shoulders

Arya bout to survive all that she been through to die of mesothelioma. I know it’s asbestos in her lungs. Hate to see it.

When Arya gets back to Winterfell to tell Sansa what happened .. x.com/screamjustin_/…

cersei and daenerys when they see each other in hell

#MemorialDay🇺🇸

Happy 38th birthday McLovin.

Nashville, you’re up tonight. Kornaic.com | #KORNAIC 📷: Sébastien Paquet from 07.21.19. in Dallas

Do you even love your kids if you don’t terrify them

At physical therapy, answering questions about my fingers: therapist: have you ever had serious injuries prior to this? me, deadpan (assuming she's joking): yes her: how many times? me, realizing she is not joking: many times her: in the last 10 years? me: in the last 40 years

This is Baker. He dances when it’s dinner time. 14/10 top-tier tippy taps

This is Heidi. She’s certain the hole in the fence is getting smaller. There is no other explanation. 13/10 would still boop

This is Fozzie. He told you to have a good day this morning. Gonna be real pupset if you didn’t. 12/10

This is Frank. He was on squirrel number 86 and you just made him lose count. Now he has to start over. 14/10 whole day wasted