Vote like a bunch of school children were shot and a bunch of other children were put into camps indefinitely bc they werent white and like a journalist was murdered and like you are being lied to daily by rich liars who harass / assault women & wont renounce white supremacy

horny 4 vote

| ￣￣￣￣￣￣| GUNS DON'T KILL PEOPLE |_____________| || yes they do || / ( •.•) || (*_* ) / 　づ ~( (>

Twitter since the election

Methinks Billy Joel doth protest too much about who started the fire

*takes a knee in the decorative gourd section of Michael's*

I came here to say REST IN PUSS HUGH HEFNER but then I thought about it and fuck that guy

If you watch Pretty in Pink backwards it's about a girl who enthusiastically destroys the world's most horrendous dress

Has anyone ever seen Donald J. Trump and a racist dickhead pile of mashed potatoes in the same room together?

It's the Day of the Girl AND girls can now be Eagle Scouts? I bet the comments on those stories are nice *reads comments* oh dear god

What idiot called it your mom's panties instead of Oedipal underwear

STRANGER: You look like Charlize Theron ME: Oh my gosh thank you so much she is so beauti- STRANGER: LET ME FINISH STRANGER: in Monster

If you have a pet snake and didn't name it Sir Pent then what is even the point of you

If Melania doesn't put on a fake nose and go as Fake Melania for Halloween I'm going to kill myself

RAY PARKER JR: Who you gonna call? ME: No one. I’d rather be eaten by ghosts than talk on the phone

GUY: You should be a cam girl ME: Thank you it's very flattering- GUY: Indeed GUY: Computer-Aided Manufacturing is a growing field for women

I wish I was a little bit taller I wish I was a baller I wish I was Sarah Sanders' dog I would maul her cc Karine Jean-Pierre hi

Today is such a great day to follow Elizabeth Hackett

WAITRESS: Ooh I love your costume are you Kathy Bates from Misery? ME: I’m not wearing a costume

Time for Louie to C K therapist