You are going to win your fantasy football league this year.

The younger folks may not know this, but: before Columbine in 1999, school shootings were not a thing anyone worried about.

INT’s thrown this season: Patrick Mahomes - 1 Josh Allen - 0 Again, who is the real turnover machine??🤔

I have never seen a sports team get more calls in my life than the Chiefs. It’s literally rigged and criminal.

If Josh Allen missed a wide open receiver in the end zone to lose the game, we’d hear about it for a month.

Let my son drink with me a couple weeks ago. He blew giant bubbles with my rare Big League Chew and had me take this picture.

Sucking dick to not have to do dishes is some lazy bitch shit.

It was a trans girl, bigot.

I've got no idea what words she was singing, but it was beautiful!

Oh.

100 percent the fault of Tyreek Hill. He was pulled over for speeding. Instead of just cooperating like a normal person he acted like a belligerent asshole and then rolled up his tinted windows while the cop was talking to him. He’s not a martyr. He’s a grown man behaving like a

Who’s next!? #LeaningTowerOfAllen

dave grohl cheating on his wife & having a baby outside of his marriage

Oh man Dave Grohl was trending and I thought he died, but it turns out he just announced to the world that he cheated on his wife and is having a baby with the mistress and he did it like it was a police department memo to the public justifying the actions of their officers

“There’s no evidence he’s Hatian” Our niggas don’t carry dead geese around, Yashar

raise your hand if you've never seen katy's roar performance

It's going to be 84 tomorrow. In fucking SEPTEMBER.

White and Hispanic women like pretty jewelry, too.

I made General Tso's chicken and holy shit, I needed water.