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The subtext of this tweet is that TEXAS has laws enabling 100% of astronauts to vote, but not college students

The NYPD spent $150 Million *extra* last year to catch people who weren't able to afford to pay the subway fare. They owed just $104,000. $150 million could buy free fares (at going rate) for 95,000 poor New Yorkers per year. Instead four people shot, including an officer.

This is how goths dress on giedi prime

imagine trying to woo pennsylvania but also scheduling a live thing on social media at the same time as the eagles game

where do you guys eat if you hate indian, mexican, ethopian, vietnamese, chinese, and other cuisines? i know you're not going to the french laundry every day. so is it just red lobster??

Why does France have 1000 years of data

Well this is humiliating

the next elder scrolls game should be set in harris county

Kinda rubbing salt in the wounds to use a government submarine to film the wreckage of a libertarian submarine.

Let’s finance this now!

?

There is such a deep trend of old people being incapable of passing the baton to the next generation that I have to imagine is some deep culturally denial of our mortality and it’s making everything suck

Mark Robinson literally did the 30 Rock bit

Kim Ogg

47 days til she's 47.

From the latest edition of The Onion: