I wasn't here. You didn't see me.

Very notable that while your classics like 'lol' and 'lmao' have hung around there's no longer any real use case for 'brb' or 'g2g'. Where are you going to go. We're all here. Everywhere is here

Children are so progressive now, I just heard kids arranging a game of house at the park say “should we have a mom and a dad or two dads?” “Two dads…but one is evil.”

Sorry I'm late. I had to scroll to my birth year on an app.

michael giacchino is an absolutely legendary composer whose score for LOST changed the standard for music in tv forever. he's also addicted to naming every track a stupid pun.

me: wow, the song playing during Boone's funeral is beautiful. i wonder what it's called

giacchino:

Don't talk to me or my sun ever again

We're referring to jacket potatoes as Jackie Ps now, update your files.

Is William Wragg MP the wario Billy Bragg?

luckily if you switch from video games to microsoft excel and then do it for 8 hours instead of 3, none of these things happen

What time is it?? SPOON TIME!

Can't believe they are going to make a MAN queen. This woke nonsense has gone too far.

What time is it?? SPOON TIME!

I'm 37 actually

I do think Sydney Sweeney's boobs are political actually in that one is to the right and one is to the left.

Apparently Japan became obsessed with RRR to the point that it's still playing in theaters there two years later and there's something magical about that

The layer of double think I'm currently at is 'Well that must actually be her and not a body double because if you WERE going to get a body double then you would at least get a GOOD one.'

I am one of them, she is this generation's Avril Lavigne.

And Xena is when Karl Urban is everyone.

I think we all know what really happened to Kate Middleton