Calling them Gen Z implies you think they’re the last one.

Spider-Men? Spiders-Man?

Hi friends. Here's my Passover playlist.
It includes classic Passover songs, lots of protest, civil rights and labor movement songs, and way more Chumbawumba B-sides than you'd expect.
open.spotify.com/playlist/54feC…

“The Four Twenny Opera”
by Berthold your Breath.

Hey. Why is it ‘Pieces of Paper’ and not ‘Slices of Paper?’

OJ Simpson died the way he lived.
Completely innocent of all charges.

When abbreviating the word “usual,” do you spell it ush? Uzh? Us’?
Or do you just live your life?

If you thought that was intense, wait until you read an XMen comic book…

Whelp, I guess it’s back to the regular, old, boring-ass sun…

I’m just really excited to find out that everyone has been huge Silver Surfer fans this whole time… so what’s your favorite issue?

I look like the kind of person who would walk into the Rock n Roll Ralph’s, and ask a cashier if THIS was the Rock n Roll Ralph’s?

It was in the water so long, its hooves were wrinkled.

'I'd call myself more of a realist.'
-Literally everyone

Me: Oh you have an easter egg by your door.
Coworker: Wait. The Easter Egg Hunt doesnt start till 10.
Me: Oh. I'm Jewish. I don't know how it works.
Coworker: Theres a sign about it on the breakroom door.
Me: I'm Jewish, I also don't read things Xtians nail to doors...

If the polls are to be believed, up to 70% of Americans disapprove of me calling them to take this poll.

Perfection

Will Trent 4 Food
Where there’s a Will there’s a Trent
Have Gun Will Trent

Hi. I voted.
And if you’ve disagreed with any political take I’ve ever posted, you’d better vote too.
You don’t want the world ruled by MY dumb opinions, do you?