Hi, I’m British. Does this mean he farted?

Music FACT: Australian singer-songwriter Sia has a younger sister called Wouldntwannabia.

Hoes is trending. What’s Santa said this time?

If you've seen one shopping centre, you've seen a mall.

On this day in 2013... 🗓

We saw the greatest moment in the history of football.

DEENEEEEEEEEEEEEEY

Who did she think she was sitting down with?

If you've seen one shopping centre, you've seen a mall.

A guy caught me saying 'good morning Pam' to a cow in a field.
I felt so silly. It was Julie, not Pam.

I know they’re a bit dim but they do know what the words in her title mean, right?

Because you’re not really supposed to name other people’s kids

Truss is the sound the bottom of a barrel makes when you scrape it.

The Tories getting rid of Boris Johnson and replacing him with Liz Truss is like a football club getting rid of the worst manager ever and replacing him with Liz Truss.

That explains why it’s all still under my pillow.

1970s FACT: The New Seekers actually did try to teach the world to sing in perfect harmony once, but failed because Holland was too flat.

Beer FACT: A julia hartley brewer only makes bitter.

Presumably Glasgow now qualifies for Europavision.