Time estimates:

“Give me one sec” - Within the hour
“I’ll be one minute” - An hour or two
“I’m on it” - Maybe today
'In a bit' - Sometime this week
“It’s on my list” - Perhaps this month
'Leave it with me' - Possibly never
“If I have time” - Never

Never being more stressed than when someone is forgetting to drink the tea you made them.

The new Very British Problems Quiz Book. The perfect companion for a rainy day.
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It’s a good day to sit and eat all the biscuits.

Being unable to end a taxi journey without saying “anywhere here’s fine, mate”

Beautiful day. Weather’s perfect. No complaints. Seems suspicious.

Happy takeaway night to all
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“Oh I’d love to but I can’t” - Translation: I don’t want to so I won’t.

Britain at the minute…
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What would you title a horror film based on Britain’s current political situation?

Pyjamas, a coat and whatever shoes are near the door - the official outfit of putting the bin out late at night.

Dear oh dear.

Well, it’s one week to go until the most British quiz book ever hits the shelves. The ultimate present for boffins. Order yours today! ☂️ Little, Brown UK
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“Everything is bleak, grey, gloomy and dull, with no chance of it brightening up soon”

“Our political editor there, and now to the weather...”

Some daylight would be nice today.

Helpful things to say to a person who has been caught in the rain:

“Still raining?”
“Look at you. You’re drenched.”
“What's it like out there?”
“Did you not take an umbrella?”
“Go and dry off”
“Don’t drip everywhere”
“Have you been outside? In this weather?”
“Look at your hair”