Cognitive therapy is great! For some people. EMDR, great! Sometimes. Somatic experiencing? Great! For some. Psychoanalysis, hypnosis, behavior therapy...all good. At times. Just remember, different tools do different stuff. Don’t try to fix everything with a hammer.

Your anger is not a character flaw, & anyone who tries to convince you it is probably benefits somehow from you not experiencing the surge of focus, motivation, & energy that often comes from anger. Get curious about why they might want you ashamed of your anger.

Blog: "Our commitment to recovery can’t be conditional. It can’t depend on whether we feel like working our recovery today or not." useyourdamnskills.com/2024/09/05/eve…

You were tough & strong enough to push through then, & you're tough & strong enough to push through now-- but REAL toughness & real strength have nothing to do w/ being mean to yourself, shaming your past or present self, or disowning or ignoring important parts of who you are.

The fact that we can get triggered & backslide has nothing to do w/ us having f*cked up-- all it means is that sometimes stressors & triggers temporarily overwhelm the tools & bandwidth we have available. No more; no less. Grace over guilt to get back on track.

No study, literature, or "expert" makes your lived experience invalid.

The fact that we have a trauma history means we have vulnerabilities other people may not have-- but also, the fact that we're working our trauma recovery means we have tools other people may never develop. We are vulnerable-- and we are skilled. Both are true & both matter.

You're not the one trauma survivor who's gonna figure out how to build self-esteem while at the same time starving & shaming yourself-- & that's not a challenge. Starvation & mean self-talk are addictions our trauma conditioning leverages to keep us struggly & distracted.

Blog: "No one reading this should have to think about any of this. We shouldn’t have to do recovery, because we shouldn’t have to think about trauma or addiction in the first place. But we do— and we do." useyourdamnskills.com/2024/09/05/eve…

Time management can be a b*tch for trauma survivors, because we do not like feeling controlled & we do not like putting things on the calendar. Traumatic experiences convince us it's pointless or even bad luck to plan-- so we get stuck kind of vibing our way through the week.

Car accidents can be traumatizing.

You do not have to "earn" the right to choose your own values, your own goals, or your own personality. You do not have to "perform" in order to "deserve" to get your basic needs met. And no, you, you there reading this right now, you are not the exception to the above.

I can usually tell when a person knows virtually nothing about ADHD if, when the subject comes up, they promptly use the term "over diagnosed" & center the conversation around stimulant meds.

As a person who was accurately diagnosed w/ ADHD as an adult & who chooses, for a variety of personal reasons, to not use stimulant medication, I kind of throw a wrench into the "adult ADHD doesn't exist/is just an excuse for people to use legal speed" arguments.

Lukewarm take: going through life w/ undiagnosed ADHD can be, by itself, a complex traumatic stressor.

Complex trauma occurs over time; it is functionally inescapable; & it entwines w/ many/most of our important relationships. Sure sounds like the experience of growing up w/ undiagnosed ADHD to me.

Dr. Glenn Patrick Doyle Ok but also, re: “just an excuse to use legal speed,” my prescription has been on back order for four weeks now which happens multiple times a year, I legit think it would be easier for me to get black market shit if I so chose. This dx is NOT an easy way to access stimulants 😩

I'm pretty disinterested in the "therapists shouldn't give advice" discussion that's currently making the rounds on therapy Twitter, but "if patients could take advice they wouldn't need therapy" has got to be one of the grosser takes I've seen. Some therapists don't even try to

We can learn to make better decisions without beating the sh*t out of ourselves for past choices that didn't work. Shame & punishment are not tools of better decision making-- they're only superficially, temporarily "motivating." If you're serious about better decisions, ease up.

We can't just "let go" of beliefs & behaviors we were conditioned to hold on to for fear of punishment or annihilation. We don't hang on to those things because we're stupid or stubborn. Realistically letting go requires safety & support-- from ourselves most importantly.