My haters have hacked my phone and found out I'm boring

me leaving the monastery

Have there been any really good jokes on this app in the last few years (do not say look in the mirror etc)

I don't think our government should be more like China's

Threw a ball for my dog and a Minnesota Timberwolves player appeared and swatted it away. Please stop this you are ruining my life

Interesting that you don't hear about the eclipse anymore. It's all that anyone talked about only a month ago

I think it's ok for students to trespass on college campuses to call attention to this

Your sense of unearned confidence really increases with age. I used to get bummed when I got job rejections and now I actually feel pity for any company who misses out on the joy of having me in a meeting

As a seasoned observer of twitter beefs my opinion is: if it were true he would've hit him with it immediately instead of the denial he issued

Since we found out my dad has Alzheimer's it's been a beautiful journey through the American health care system with fun twists at every stage

It's scary what's happening. People who, only 5 years ago, were 25 or 27 at most, are now 30 and in some cases even 33 years old

(Seeing an example of injustice in history) It's very obvious to me who the underdog is (seeing an almost exactly analogous situation today) This is complicated

One time in college I wrote a final paper and then my computer died so I had to rewrite it from scratch the night before it was due. To these kids I'm a medieval peasant or perhaps farm animal

The Columbia protests remind me a lot of Jan 6. Sorry if that's wrong but I only watch TV on mute. Today I turned on HGTV and got scared because I saw some guys demolishing a house

doing dishes and had the thought “the sink helps you with water”. such a hauntingly dimwitted sentence to produce that im actually a bit frightened now. there’s no way the brain that produced that thought is capable of making something of my life. time will tell

You, a horny uncultured fool: the zendaya threesome movie

Me, a student of cinema: the zendaya threesome FILM

Supreme Court wrestling with the question whether one person should be above the law and it's the person who controls our entire military

'it's not stupid if it works', cf.

The perfect government is one that's authoritarian to my enemies and democratic to me