Cat Deeley, sometimes referred to as the 4th Ant or Dec was the original drummer before

May divorce be with you

In the mid 90s I worked for a teen mag. One day our phones rang constantly with crying girls asking if Jared Leto had died. Was just panic and rumour. LIKE YOU LOT YESTERDAY GOING ON ABOUT KHAN LOSING. Ya fools.

I’d just like to be rich enough to be considered eccentric instead of unstable.

You guys remember when Liza married that ventriloquist dummy? That was crazy.

Every time anyone posts about the count, I think of:

The apocalypse better not happen now...

I keep a universal remote in my bag to turn down pub TVs if they are too loud.

What is this feeling? I don't recognise it...
Is it joy, happiness, long awaited relief?
I've forgotten how to act!

Ah I think it’s time to celebrate and get really shit faced tonight 👍

London Mayoral election was a bit like Fleetwood Mac. Rumours turned into Little Lies.

Does everyone sing:
'Gordon Brown, texture like sun'
When you hear him mentioned?

is it me ... or has the weather improved ... since yesterday .... when the TORY SCUM had their arse cheeks parted and a gurt big Knobbly Parsnip inserted ... I know I'm feeling so much better ... knowing that a GE is now even closer 👍👍👍👍👍👍

Never forget.

Mayor The Fourth Be With You.

May divorce be with you.

Just been DM’d to say old fat women can’t be smart enough to do a PhD. Wait till I tell them I’m gay!

The year’s most hilarious/horrible combo headline so far.

Writing a book titled “‘What the fuck is that’ and other questions that they did not teach us in school”.

Her name was Yoda,
A showgirl she was.

#StarWarsDay